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Quarantined Critic Blog

Lost in time, lost in space…

A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987) October 3rd, 2021

This review contains spoilers. Alfred Hitchcock once said ‘…in the fiction film the Director is a God; he must create life.” If that’s true then Wes Craven is the God of A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors. Like the Judeo-Christian God, Craven bestowed his commandments unto the world via an emissary whose voice … Continue Reading A Nightmare on Elm Street 3: Dream Warriors (1987) October 3rd, 2021

Pig (2021) July 17th, 2021

I don’t like bacon. It seems simple enough to prepare but the narrow sweet spot between overdone and undercooked escapes many. Countless diner orders ventured too far to one extreme or the other leaving the meal either a wet rubbery leather or a smoking plate of blackened shards. The same goes for a quirky post-arthouse … Continue Reading Pig (2021) July 17th, 2021

Werewolves Within (2021) July 5th, 2021

Werewolves Within is the first film, excluding private showings, I’ve seen in theaters since the pandemic began and it was exactly what I wanted. A well-written clever comedy-horror whodunnit. It’s like Shaun of the Dead meets Knives Out. Werewolves Within’s connection to Simon Pegg’s classic zomcom is only strengthened by it’s filmmaker’s deliberately imitating Edgar … Continue Reading Werewolves Within (2021) July 5th, 2021

The Day of the Dolphin (1973) June 1st, 2021

The limits of cetacean intelligence have fascinated me since I was five and first saw Free Willy. If you’re unfamiliar, Free Willy‘s the story of a troubled foster kid from Seattle named Jesse who’s gotten into hot water for vandalizing a local aquarium/sea park. He’s sentenced to remove all the spray-paint and repair any damage … Continue Reading The Day of the Dolphin (1973) June 1st, 2021


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