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The Quarantined Critic

“Time enough at last.”

Welcome to the Quarantined Critic, the movie-review blog for pandemic survivors.
It’s only a matter of time before the next variant eradicates us all.

Savor your days by reading my movie reviews.

Recent Reviews

Jurassic World: Dominion (2022) June 12th, 2022

Jurassic Park brought colorful dinosaurs to life on screen and used them to camouflage a poignant science fiction morality tale. 30 years later Jurassic World: Dominion is a Jurassic Park branded thrill ride exploring the shallowest of the human experiences differing only cosmetically from the other vapid summer franchise cash grabs. Worst of all, the…

Top Gun: Maverick (2022) June 8th, 2022

You probably heard Top Gun: Maverick’s a thrilling adventure flick with stunning practical effects that push the frontier of cinematography. It’s also a damn good time at the movies. If that isn’t enough to get you into the theater… then you must really hate the theater. For all its roaring success, Top Gun: Maverick cannot…

The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent (2022) May 27th, 2022

The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent gets as close to a masterpiece as any Nicholas Cage movie can. The meta narrative pulls from some real aspects of Nicholas Cage’s life like financial struggles pushing him to take unglamorous roles and high paying private appearances. In The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent he’s offered a million…

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